just another one of those end of the year reflections

mm.. i think 2009 was the best year of my life so far
it was full of pain and suffering and abuse
but in the midst of it all i was able to swallow my pride and depend on God
and there is nothing more wonderful than that

what have i accomplished in 2009?....

i met some amazing people, amazing teachers. i fell more in love with jesus. i gained a more intimate relationship with art, with my drawing pencils and hands. i learned that pride is my biggest flaw. i met and conversed with a homeless man who gave me a pack of gum. i stayed single the entire year and refused to get immersed and distracted in silly infatuations (haeyoon would laugh at this). i realized what the biggest regret of my life was. i smiled a lot, especially at strangers who looked like they had a bad day. i questioned my motives and intentions alot. i completely surprised myself by opening up and sharing something so personal at a retreat. i became amazingly close with people i never would have thought i would even get along with. i nosebled every single day for three consecutive weeks. i spent three whole weeks in baltimore studying art history. i understood, or i think i did, how lucky i am for having the most wonderful parents and brother ever. mmm.. i think the biggest would be discovering more about myself, and just starting to embrace myself for who i am, along with all my flaws and imperfections. i'm not quite there yet, but i'm learning :)

2010, what do you have in store for meee

it's the best feeling in the world to come home late from a long day and right when you walk through the door the first thing you see is a lighted christmas tree in a dark living room..

it's kind of like, you're living in darkness, battling struggles everyday, but there's always a bit of light, hope, something to look forward to and hold on to, if you tweak your perspective & attitude
because after all, you can't see stars unless it's pitch black